176)
QUOTE: Women only hold the value men assign to them. So, if men don't value our vaginas or other parts, then we are probably practically useless to them.
Lol, you don't understand women or yourself (let alone men) very well if you think that. The measure of a person's worth, man or woman, is their actions.....what they do with their life, the virtues they cultivate and the way they impact the world. EVERY person is in full control of their worth. Further, how other people view you, has virtually no bearing at all on your worth. You have the sole authority and responsibility to judge your own actions. The better you are at doing this and in choosing what you do wisely, the more empowered you become. Weak, fucked up people will try to deny what you are. But, they are nothing to the person who cultivates power this way. Also, unlike the fucked up manipulator, a worthy person never lacks for friends, allies and others who will help him.
This is the difference between a whore and a woman of quality. What Mr. Huh is alluding to here is most American women choose to be whores (and cheap whores at that)....then they wonder why they are of low worth. Too many American women aren't satisfied to just be a whore; they strive to be a $5 crack whore instead of a $500 a night high class whore.
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177)
QUOTE: Women still have yea or nay choice even the supposed initiation power men posses.
This is not nearly as cut and dried as you might think. Yes, when it comes down to one man pursuing one woman, it's the woman who decides. However, at least in our culture, only men do the pursuing. The woman is FORCED (mostly by her own foolish neurosis) to only be able to choose from among those who chase her. It's a pretty limited pool, most of the time. However, I can choose to chase as many women as I want.....a pool limited only by time constraints. My personal choice for handling this issue is to pursue a great many women, but only a tiny bit. Most could not care less about me. They get barely a second look. A much smaller amount are interested in me (the prime attribute I use for deciding to put any energy of any type toward a woman). A small subset of them are highly motivated to get me. They get the lions share of my attention. Constantly searching out more and more women means this pool is always relatively large and I AM THE ONE WHO GETS TO CHOOSE AMONG THEM. Who has the choice now? Out of 100 chicks, I might approach 10, follow up with 3 and choose to sleep with one of them. 90% of those girls get nothing more than the once over from me. Ten get a polite conversation. Three will want to be with me. But I will only choose one based on how motivated she is to please me and certain other factors that are just my personal taste. A woman has to take what she can get. I do not.....provided I am willing to go out and get it. How much control does a woman really have over initiation behavior when I'm the one who chooses if I want to initiate with her?
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178)
QUOTE: I don't mind making more than my husband. I put that as an example b/c I knew someone would say "Height cannot change, but weight can." Income can also change, and men feel uncomfortable with that requirement. It would not matter to me.
I think most people who don't have money have completely the wrong idea about this. A husband and wife do not compete or compare when it comes to incomes. Nor does the man bring home the bacon while any money the woman has is for play (this is the dominant attitude in couples with disposable income). People work together to make money. That's one of the secrets rich people have. It's how they got rich. Often, you'll see couples with complementary skills. One spouse has the money generating skills (business person, or professional usually) and the other has the money management skills (typically lawyer, accountant or real estate broker). If you are a man or a woman and you want wealth from your marriage, THAT'S the way to get it.
This is an example of what I mean by neurosis when it comes to choosing men that most women have. It is completely appropriate for a woman to have certain reasonable standards when it comes to income. Pretty much, you have to have a job and you have to have a roof over your head. Why? Because a man who doesn't is usually an omega male....and outcast, drug dealer, wife beater......a loser. What a woman should look for in a man are skills, goals, and focus.....particularly those that are in line with her own. For example, say you just happen to be a lawyer, you probably would want to hook up with another professional, say an accountant. Together, you live well below your means and invest your extra income in a business and use your collective skills to nurture it. You will make more money than God.
But, that's not what most women do. Having no real interest in money at all, they know that men who have a lot of money are rare and SIMPLY WANT THE STATUS OF BEING WITH A RARE MAN. Who cares if he actually sucks as a man? Or worse, she wants to steal his money. Any way you slice it, that's a recipe for disaster.
Men should ALWAYS show a woman he has tons of skills, well developed (written) goals and a laser-like focus. But, he must be very careful to keep the fact that he has money, well hidden. It attracts the wrong type of woman.
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179) Responsibility and power go hand in hand. Any time you become a source of solutions to people’s problems or become vital to meeting their needs, you become important to them. Often they don't notice until there is a disagreement and your voice carries more weight than theirs because they need you more than you need them.
In the last couple of generations, most women have simply lost interest in those behaviours that meet the needs of those around them and instead, focus on behaviours that are mostly useless. For example, many women ignore the behaviours that go with marriage and family (although near 100% of women will get married and/or have a family) to spend their time and effort on a career. But, they never bother to ask themselves if their "career" is important. In other words, is the work they are doing meeting the vital needs of other people. Mostly, the answer is no, and they simply can't understand why this situation doesn't meet their desire for importance, wealth, status and power. Worse, the lack of behaviours in the family situation completely disempowers them from being able to choose what happens with that situation. The kids become fucked up. The marriage deteriorates. It isn't important to her and she isn't important to it. The whole thing....job, husband, family, becomes a dissatisfying mess. The average woman (ie more women then not) simply wander off, then the real problems start. This is a grim situation for all involved but worst of all for the woman. An older, divorced woman, tied down with kids, in a nowhere dead-end job is best described as marginalized....with no options for the future and no self-esteem. Most women are headed there and FAST. And they don't even know it.
Any person can avoid that fate by doing the opposite. Decide what you want out of life, make goals, AND WRITE THEM DOWN, keep track of daily behaviours you take to make those goals manifest. Move your focus away from appearances and ego, and useless, time wasting behaviours and focus on specific problem solving and being of service to society. Don't get a job unless you desperately need the money, have a legitimate career or (best of all) own a business. Whatever you do, make sure the work you are doing is important. If it is mostly busy work, make changes immediately (let the 99% of people who are directionless schlubs, do the busy work).
But, most important of all, decide early and for certain if you want marriage and a family (if you are a hardcore career girl that is actually going places instead of just fooling herself, you have a difficult choice to make) and how that will fit into your life. Ignore appearances, fantasies and bullshit and choose a man based on substance and character, whose goals match your own. Who is an asset (your spouse is usually your first, most important and most valuable asset.....or your worst, most horrible liability) Figure it out early in life (unfortunately for women, the later in life you figure it out, the worse off you will be) and go after it with iron willed determination. Then, focus the lion’s share of your effort, time and attention on your marriage and family. You MUST make your marriage permanent, loving, fulfilling and sane. You MUST socialize your children. Not doing so makes you worthless.
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180) Drama
You've hit on one of the major techniques for seducing a woman. However, understand that you are dealing with extremely transitory states. Over time, her receptivity to your trying to stimulate strong emotion in her drops (the more she gets to know you, the less you can provoke a fantasy in her....even if it's not actually a fantasy, but reality). Also, the moment you stop, your relationship vanishes. No matter how cool, rich, powerful, pretty, mysterious, passionate, or sexy you are, the value she places on you drops over time. Once it reaches zero, she is immune to your charms. This is, of course, completely insane. If you stick around too long, you can and will have the wonderful experience of her wandering off from you, after all the energy you expended toward keeping her attracted to you, to be with a total loser. You could be going out on romantic dates, doing exciting, dangerous things together, followed by hours of mind blowing sex, only to have her leave you for some asshole who only wants to lay on the couch, and hasn't gotten it up in a decade, because she thinks you are boring. As a matter of fact, she won't stick around you much longer than if it was you laying around on the couch all day.
Doing stuff like this is great for getting laid. But, to maintain a relationship, it just doesn't work, because the reason relationships fizzle out is solely due to a woman's choice to not breathe life into it.Rather than work too hard to make a woman attracted, I prefer to make strong attraction to me, the main criteria for letting a woman be a part of my life. The moment her attraction starts to wane, I start looking for a woman who IS attracted to me. Look at it this way, in the beginning (within reason) it is the man's responsibility to foster attraction in a woman. But, very quickly, it becomes the woman's responsibility to feel attraction (and other emotions like warmth, affection and love). The emotions are actually behaviours she chooses to do. They don't just happen and they aren't a response to what you do (you can only just prime the pump), they are something she chooses to DO. And women do them, until they lose interest and wander off. Then, it's like you never existed.
Or, to put it another way, love is a verb.
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181) One of the things that bothered me the most was discovering (by meeting these people in my own social circles) that feminists (particularly lesbian feminists) are actively seeking careers as teachers with the specific intent of promoting feminist, anti-man, ideology. To quote one chick, we are being subversive. We want kids to have our values, not their parents’ values. The implication was that their parents’ values were sick, while theirs were good. There are two problems with this. It is completely disrespectful and in no way their place, to make such a decision for children who aren't theirs. The other problem is the parents values are actually normal (that's why their lives are fulfilling, stable and sane) while the lesbians' values are totally fucked up (that's why their lives are miserable, unstable and constantly filled with insane situations).
We need to pass strict laws on what teachers are allowed to do in the classroom. Children are sent to school to learn skills and knowledge, not (usually sick) social conditioning.
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182) Sarcasm has two meanings when a woman uses it. When she says she is sarcastic, what she means is she will be mean to you, try to cut you down and make you feel bad with humour that belittles you. But, when she says she is looking for a lover who is sarcastic, what she means is she wants a guy who engages in light hearted teasing with sexual undertones (think little boys chasing little girls around the playground to tug on their hair), often busting her balls, challenging her about her beliefs etc. in a way that is best defined as cocky. In family type relationships, older siblings often do this to younger siblings as a normal way of fostering bonding and closeness. It's natural and normal for a woman to want that from her man. It's neither natural, nor normal for a woman to want to be what she is calling "sarcastic". Don't fall for the double-speak. When used to describe a man, it means affectionate. When used to describe a woman, it means abusive. Very rarely, you will run into a woman who is "sarcastic" like she wants from a man. She is trying to prime the pump to get you to act the same way, and she never calls herself sarcastic. It is very easy to tell the difference. It has a benevolent quality, rather than a malevolent one (this also goes for weeding out the rare abusive man, BTW).
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183) Outside of the psychos, my experience has been that women don't hate men (any woman who hates men is a pariah....and knows it). The problem is that they don't love them either. They feel, and are often addicted to the strong emotions and temporary states of love. But they never build the shared purpose, evolution, growth and bonding that goes along with love. That's the part that endures and builds over time. That's the part that is real. The moment they don't get their "fix" of strong emotions, they're gone. That's a problem, because you absolutely cannot have a marriage or even a monogamous relationship under those circumstances. You can never go beyond just dating without it turning into a disaster. To make matters worse, the man is usually building all those things from his point of view. When she leaves, she rips an important piece of his psyche out. Many men don't recover. And many women die on the vine, some time after their 30's, from lack of real love (not just the emotion) in their lives.
There are large numbers of women who are in marriages and other relationships and are just empty shells of suffering and don't know why. This is why.
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184)
QUOTE: In my case it wasn't just "pussy" that kept me around, I deeply loved my girlfriend and wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. And she talked like she wanted that too. But she didn't want to cooperate and work with me towards that goal, she just wanted to keep testing me and pushing the envelope to see what she could get away with. She would intentionally do things that she knew I would find upsetting just so she could get me upset. Stupid things, like keeping the radio or TV on loud all night.
This is a perfect example of what I am talking about. She wants the strong emotions and doesn't care that the particular emotions she gets are negative (anger, fear, jealousy pain etc.) Worse, there really is no relationship as far as she is concerned (it doesn't matter that you have built a relationship and think you two are in love). You could (and usually are) married for 20 years with 4 kids, and she walks away without a second thought. That's because it was all pretend for her. And the consequences don't matter to her.
What this means, quite simply, is there is no way in hell you can be monogamous with her. No matter your situation. No matter what you have been to eachother, what's REALLY going on is she has never moved past the initial stages of infatuation. Your "relationship" doesn't exist and she will disrespect you if you think it does. She will do a hell of a lot more, if you are stupid enough to marry her and/or have kids.
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185) The problem with ladder theory is it assumes women make choices based on an objective evaluation of the value of a man that is commonly agreed upon. All you have to do is look around to see that isn't true. If anything, we have a big problem in our culture with criminal status men gaining access to normal and high status women.....often ruining them in the process. Also, the idea that there is a friend ladder and a sex ladder isn't true. People can and do "hop ladders" all the time, with little or no effort, simply by changing their behavior toward the person. If anything, women keep their so-called male friends as a "dick in reserve". Is that really a separate ladder? No. She is just giving a guy that should be given high priority because of his traits (looks, personality etc.) low priority because he isn't acting in the way that stimulates her neurotic personality correctly.
The problem with women is they are nuts. When you meet them and start to get "involved" with them, from your perspective, you are building a relationship......something real, that has permanence over time. That's what people who are involved are supposed to be doing. But, that's not what she is doing. From her point of view, although she gives lip service to the relationship, she will only stick around for as long as you provoke strong feelings in her. The moment you slip, even if you are married, with kids, for 20 years, she is gone. The sicker ones don't care if the feelings are positive or negative. Want to hop ladders? Learn to provoke strong feelings in her. She'll jump your bones.
Ladder theory is the way things should be. Want a hot, high status, young, fertile woman? Then go to the gym until your body looks like a model's, wear expensive fashionable clothes, and get a high-paying, high-status job where you are the boss. Sounds great. Those are all things a powerful, motivated man can and usually will do. There is a problem though. IT DOESN'T WORK. Women don't give priority to men like that. They say they do, but their behavior doesn't match up with this. You'll get more play, as a dirty, dishevelled member of a rock band that is going nowhere fast or as a drug dealer. Even the women that do go for the man with money are only looking to exploit him. They don't want him, they want his money. Of course, they don't want a strong man with money (because he'll keep her on a tight leash). They want a WEAK, low status man with money.
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